You damn kids! Get off my lawn!

There was a time when rock snobs, as annoying and pretentious they were (and still are to some degree), actually knew their shit. They were high and mighty because they knew they could school you with their vast musical knowledge. Are they even trying anymore?
I was on the bus this morning, and I came across an advertisement for the local hipster store. They’re pretty commonplace on buses, but for some reason this particular ad really irked me. The models showing off the products were your standard retro-rock fare: big glasses, Bowie make-up and band shirts. Fairly mild stuff, but it was the product descriptions that set me off. Instead of details of what was being sold, we get a written history of the bands on the shirts these seventeen year olds are wearing. These weren’t some flash in the pan ‘I-knew-them-before-they-were-cool’ bands that are all the rage right now, either. It was the fucking Rolling Stones, The Doors, and Guns N’ Roses!
Now, I have no issue with this new generation of kids grooving to The Doors. In fact, I would prefer it over 90% of the tripe produced today. But you should not be wearing the shirt of a band you’ve never heard of, or have only minimal knowledge of because your hippy music teacher mentioned “People are Strange” in between bong hits. Listen to the music, and make sure you actually enjoy the band before running out and spending retarded money on some “vintage” merchandise because that’s what the cool kids do.
Here’s where I backtrack a little, because there is a silver lining to all this. Having that snippet of info beside the T’s might very well encourage someone who doesn’t know what an Axl Rose is to find some GN’R, and then decide if an Appetite for Destruction shirt is right for them. Even so, I can’t help but think the store put these little history lessons up just to twist young wannabe minds into thinking “Ooh, This band is old! I bet I’ll be popular if I own their merchandise.”, and that is why it pissed me off.
Maybe I’m wrong, and this is just my ridiculously old-timey brain spouting off about ‘Kids these days.” I also feel a little hypocritical, since I’m basically complaining about scenesters by being one myself. The world’s funny like that.

Did I really say grooving?


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